Fellow bloggers and other readers I am leaving for college tomorrow. By the way I am quite excited for that as its IIT Kanpur. I am among the last in my friend circle to leave and most of them have already left. Among the friends here some want to meet me before I leave but cant due to practical problems and then there are some who want to meet , can meet but wont . Queer indeed. Hence friends the frequency of my posts will vary. Sorry for that. But for friends who will still blog - enjoy it and express yourselves always. Don't just keep things to yourselves. Bye guys for now. Cheers and laters.

Sarcasm, by definition, is an cutting often ironic statement intended to wound or humour. Definitely not something to use when you are at the barber's. Why you may want to ask? Because of the following events:


1. A bright,sunny Sunday it was and God only knows why everyone in this part of the country finds Sunday the unwritten day to get your haircut. The practical reason behind this trend is obviously Sunday being a holiday and you need not worry about going to work but can worry about your looks. So there was this really long queue at the barber's.

After having read the newspaper twice and heard to all the vernacular hits from the stereo and forty-five minutes the guy just ahead of me his turn came. He was still scooping the newspaper and had also waited 45 minutes. The barber guy asked him,"Sir,have you come to have your hair cut?"

"No I have come to read the newspaper." The man said with heavy sarcasm and returned to his news. So I went ahead and got seated.

Fifteen minutes later as I was leaving our sarcasm man was bickering why his turn had not come and the barber guy replied, "Sir you only said yourself you just came to read the newspaper. Believe me sir some people come here to do that."

But 'sir' was not in the mood for sarcasm.

2.I had gone for a haircut and this barber guy asks me "Do you want to have a shave also?"
This time I reply sarcastically "Yeah definitely. Shave also. That will also test how well you can shave others." I told this cause I had shaved myself just the day before.

But seriously this guy had no sense of sarcasm and had prepared his foam and was about to apply when I stopped him.

Seriously , barbers might be good at talking about a lot of topics while doing their job but sarcasm does not go well with them.

I was at the railway station today booking tickets for a trip and they were more than one person. there who were not in their best moods.


"And 100% tax exemption for political funding. You have hundreds of crores for political campaigns and they go tax free now..." Mr. A was shouting.

"Now that it is raining,I am hating it. The road in front of my house has disappeared. Can you believe that there are people who enjoy all this rain. My landlady's children were bathing yesterday in this rain with soap and scrubber at night 9 . Can you believe that?" Told Mr.X to someone.

"See the guy in front of you has made his ticket but has not paid.So you have to wait for him to come or pay his money and take your ticket," said the clerk. After listening to this a Mr. D forgot he was at a public place and shouted at the top of his voice at the clerk. This was reasonable though I thought.

I don't know why but today was not a normal day there.But the most amazing (why am I calling someone's spontaneous overflow of emotions 'amazing'?) and entertaining(Why entertaining?) is the one that follows.

There was this homely, beautiful girl standing with her father in the ladies and physically handicapped line. As soon as her turn came the father sidelined his daughter and started talking with the woman in charge of that ticket-counter.

"You are neither physically disabled nor a woman. So how come you are standing in this line?" she demanded.

"Well, my daughter was standing in the line..," the father defended himself.

"Just use your daughter. Keep her in a corner of the house and don't let her out to learn things herself. You know , mister, that you are the reason why women in this country can't progress and become independent. Because of people like you the purpose of a girl's life here is only to change a surname and stand in a ladies' line.See I don't want to make an issue."

"Make an issue? You already have, ma'm. Why don't yo just make the tickets and give us? I know you have a monotonous job and you are taking out your frustration like this?"

"Enough sir. If I did not do this monotonous job you can't go on your little trip to..." Looking a the form she said, " Bangalore. If I wanted..."

"Look,ma'm I have had enough of this.I will complain to..."

The 'homely' girl now had also had enough and went to the counter.Setting her father aside she said,"Ma'm please make the tickets." And finally this woman made.

Seriously something was wrong today. May be this woman let loose her feelings because there was no one else in the line. May be...




Subhayan of the fame of 'Wrahoolz Wramblingz' fame has honoured and humbled me with 'The Totally Bindaas Blogger' award. I hereby put that award on display. You can catch the entire award ceremony by this link if you are interested: http://wramblingz.blogspot.com/2009/07/ok-everybody-this-is-post-you-all-had.html.

Now Subhayan is a really enterprising guy who has hit two targets with one arrow. Not only has he given the awarded bloggers appreciation plus has got together a number of bloggers - all very different in the topics they write on and their approach to the decided topics. Hats-off to you, Subhayan. And again thanks a lot.

11 PM

"Debi just tell hello to the person I put you through on the conference now, okay,"said Shruti.

"Okay." So finally she had found someone for me. YIPEEE!!!

"Hi." Said a defintively male voice.

I said hello as instructed and he kept the phone. So this girl is trying to hook me up with a guy or what? I needed an explanation.

She called five minutes later.

"Debi, thanks a lot. That guy was such a bore. Let me tel you then what all he has been telling..."

That made me heave a sigh of relief and all my questions were answered(at least those that mattered.)

"See. Anurag is this guy in my class. He somehow got my phone number and is calling me up at odd hours. First up he calls and when I ask him his name he tells "What's in a name oh pretty maiden, call me by any I will still be yours " and then after a pause adds "by Shakespeare with the help of Anurag." So Debi see he actually gives me his name but ..."

"...praises himself also.He has style then. Quite a casanova you have got there," I say looking at the broken watch on my table.

"I talked first. Just like that. But he does not want just like that. He wants all that. Comes up with cheesy romantic lines and bores. He must have told that I am beautiful about a hundred times in the two times he has actually called. Seriously boys do get a little over-confident on phone, Orkut, Facebook etc etc as compared to real-life.But I know he is just a 'windy' guy."

She really knows guys then. Or at least thinks so? But another terminology after Kutian.'Windy.."

"'Windy' meaning?" asked a confused Debi.

"Windy as in who talks a lot and thus creates a lot of wind and is incapable of strong action. So today when he called first I let it ring and then informed you. So he thought my father or brother picked up and thus hung."

Smart thinking there (na?). Seriously girls in colleges and in higher education ar subject to such idiotic overtures of 'friendship' and I guess Shruti did come up with a good way to avoid but then you need to have conference call facility for that.

"Issued in Public Interest for People who have the Chromosome that I don't"


Seriously when we all shout(this includes me also guys.. notice I used 'we') that people making advertisements are stupid we must realise that their target audience must be expected to be as much stupid if not more. Why do these people under-estimate us so much? A few case-studies...I am not using any names. You know just in case...


1.An AD for a Soap That is Supposed to Make us Fairer
A girl uses this soap(let's call it 'good') on one cheek and another 'ordinary' soap on the other cheek and WOW! The one with the ordinary soap is darker than the one that was done with the soap in question. Friends I don't know about the Photoshop effects used and make up used to prove one cheek darker(Come on that had to be false a girl that pretty would never agree to such attrocities.) but look at this... The lighting of her face is done from the 'good soap' side so that the shadow of the nose naturally darkens the 'ordinary soap' side. I hope you are getting what I am implying.

2.An AD for Chips
A girl and a guy are making a dish where the ingredients are this, that and the chips obviously. They make some idiotic dish with everything else but the chips and they finally throw away the dish in the dustbin(It was really idiotic!!) and eat the chips. WOW! How does this highlight the good features of the chips? Yes it did highlight their slogan but that is equally idiotic guys...

3.An AD for A Computer Training Programme
A girl comes in for an interview and drops her certificates(by mistake or by design I really don't know) and on one of these certificates the name of this programme was written. Somehow all the other entrants see this certificate and of their own accord leave leaving this girl to collect the certificate after ample time, give a million-dollar smile for the camera before going for the interview. Now where in the world do we find such under-confident people for an interview? Plus by this the ad is trying to give us the message by telling "WE ARE GOOD". Who doesn't? Who won't say they are good? Come on show us something about your institute or your programme details. Anything but this.

4.An AD for A Cellphone Network Providing Company
Showcasing the captain of our Indian cricket team advertising the fact that he can stay connected to his friends by a particular site which can be run by a particular service that this network provides. Once this happened. Our respected captain had got out and then this AD was aired. I was buying something at this hotel. Captain tells in ad "I love to be connected to my friends" and a guy at the hotel says "I think that was why you got out so early this time? Now remain connected till the next innings..."Sorry Captain don't take it in the wrong sense.

5.An AD for a Bike
A man finds a genie. He gives him everything "hi-fi"but this guy wanted "normal" stuff - be it a house, a wife or a bike.So he rejects the "good" bike the one being advertised for and takes a normal one. So the bottom-line is that the bike was good or rather hi-fi. But how and why?

Come on advertisers you have enough creativity to come up with such peculiar ideas just do something with substance. I know you all work under a lot of time pressure but make your ads worth their air-rate(if that is the term)...





I have been tagged by Shilpa(again) and Subhayan for both the tags below.


1. 5 Things I Love About Myself
Frankly I feel very blocked when asked such abstract questions about myself.So here goes...

1.My memory.(I think it's good in terms of events not that good in terms of exact statistical data.)
2.I enjoy whatever thing I decide to take up.(Hey don't judge the opposite thing that I take up things that I enjoy.)
3.I think I give good advice and suggestions to others on almost everything.
4.I also like my observational skills.
5.My family and friends - very helpful and supportive of what I do or aspire to do.

See I am very bad at all this stuff. The above write-up seems so self-obsessed(What else did you expect?)

2. Get to Know Me Tag

Q.How tall are you barefoot?
A.5 feet 8 and a half inches

Q.Have you ever smoked before?
A.No.

Q.Do you own a gun?
A.No.

Q.If you had a mental disorder what would it be?
A.Some disease in which I can see vivid visuals that no one else has seen.(I don't have one now though.)

Q.How many letters are in your crush's name?
A.Guess that 'crush' is no longer a crush....

Q.What's your fav silly song?
A.Excuse me Kya re.

Q.What do you prefer to drnk in the morning?
A.Lemon tea.

Q.What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up today?
A.What must be Subhayan's reply to that big comment I left on his blog?

Q.What secret weapon do you use to lure the opposite sex?
A.Weapon..It's love not war. May be humour.

Q.Do you own a knife?
A.No.

Q.Name the last thing you bought today?
A.Dairy Milk for my sister.

Q.Name five regular drinks you drink?
A.Milk,Tea,Coffee,Water and Mango shake.

Q.What time did you wake up today?
A.9 AM(Hey I had slept at 1AM)

Q.What song do you want to be played at your funeral?
A.I don't think they play songs in Hindu funerals.

Q.What song did you last hear?
A."Teardrops on My Guitar" by Taylor Swift.

Q.Favorite Place to Be?
A.Home or Somewhere with my friends.

Q.Least fav place to be?
A.Get-togethers where I am Out-of-place.

Q.Do you own slippers?
A.Yeah..Who doesn't?

Q.Where do you think you will be in ten years from now?
A. No idea.

Q.Do you burn or tan?
A.Well...

Q.Yellow or blue?
A.Blue

Q.What songs do you sing in the shower?
A.None.

Q.What did you think was going to get to tou at night as a child?
A.Ghosts or may be giant spiders.

Q.What is in your pockets right now?
A.Nothing.

Q.Last thing that made you laugh?
A."Whose Line is It anyway?"

Q.Best bed sheets you had as a child?
A.Hey, there's a limit now. I am really tired of non-sense questions.

Q.Worst injury you have had?
A.A broken wrist.

Q.Do you wish on stars?
A.No.(All these Do you.. questions I have answered in the negative.)

Q.What were you doing at 1AM last night?
A.I have already answered that.

Q.Name 3 things yoy are thinking right now?
A. Well..
1.Why Me,Shilpa and Subhayan?
2.Who made up these questions?
3.I feel blocked again....










Technically.....
Finally Hindi cinema is coming of age. Point to be noted here is we are making good movies on terrorism -Black Friday, Mumbai Meri Jaan,Aamir,A Wednesday and now New York.Director Kabir Khan comes back well after making Kabul Express which was almost a documentary. This one is based on the attrocities that were carried on the Asians that were detained after 9/11 attack. Very well researched indeed. Even at a point Irrfan Khan provides a reason why this detention was necessary.Another Bollywood director might have focussed more on the friendship of the three and its development from square one. But luckily enough our director wraps all that in a song and does not stray much. The story and the screenplay are both well written and make this movie really pacy.The cinematography is really good , brilliantly capturing some moments and the associated pain from the detention centre that leave us shocked. The buildings of New York look very beautiful-their beauty can also be questioned. The background music is very different from regular Hindi movies and is mostly made of rocking guitar riffs that only add to the pace. The songs have been slightly forced and sometimes seem nagging as they are used simultaneously with narration. Luckily there are ony three songs.The ending is different - as to whether you like it or not it's a matter of perspective.

And the Actors
Basically the story revolves around only four characters - mostly stereotyped. John Abraham has to play the NRI(Dostana, Goal) , Katrina Kaif ,the NRI girl,(she looks like that plus the accent. Singh is King, Namastey London) and Irrfan Khan has to play the cop(Slumdog Millionaire). Nevertheless all of them act well and you can defintely see maturity in Katrina's acting. Neil Nitin Mukesh has some emo-scenes which he carries off with elan. Overall all the actors show a sense of maturity.

The Verdict
Watch it for something new and fresh. It is a very serious movie,well-researched and definitely different.

I must admit to be a teacher is one of the most difficult jobs in this age especially in the primary level when apart from imparting education you also need to inculcate moral values.


But in the secondary level I have seen, have heard about and have been taught also by some queer teachers. And what I have noticed is that these guys have their own pre-planned escape routes if their present knowledge is not good enough to answer a doubt.

Q:Sir, I have a doubt in Q3.

Here are some unique situations:

1.The teacher stares hard at the question and finally is enlightened to the fact that he is not enlightened enough to enlighten the student and lightens himself of the book.

And looks around the class and starts a lecture like this :

"You students will study.... Before asking such questions you all must realise whether you deserve to know the answer, whether you are capable to know the answer. Just ask yourselves that... The answer will obviously be NO. It is all the fault of ..."

The student was thinking that it must be the fault of sir himself as it is he who taught. But it is the fault of..

"..Co-education. Make pairs and sit in classroom. How can you all concentrate in such a situation. End up in cyber-cafes God knows doing what. Sit in front of TV..."

And the lecture ends with the bell and the doubt still remains.

2."Ram will answer the question. He is my favourite student and I know I have given him enough training to be able to answer the question.So Ram.."

Two cases:

(1) If Ram is present he solves the question most of the time and if he is not able to he is at the receiving end and poor chap he is also thrown out of the class.

(2)If Ram is absent then sir expresses his sadness and tells that he is really sad that the only kid who makes his teaching an enjoyable experience is absent and in that ocean of despondency the doubt is drowned.

3. "Stupid very stupid. I must say last year's teachers were so lineant upon you. Do this one first and show me."

And he starts off with elementary examples that are easy to solve.

4."See...my friends Newton had a similar story..." Saying so hhe narrates a story which I think he must have mugged up from 101 Great Lives and ensures the expansion of the story is long enough and interesting enough for the doubt to be cleared off the kiddo's mind.

5.(And the most-cliched trick teachers all around India use and this had happened with me in school.)

"It is not in the syllabus"

"Ma'm, but you only had told to underline and I have a doubt nevertheless..."

"I can explain it to you but I don't think the class will understand."

I was expecting others in the class to retaliate this thinly-veiled insult but no one did.

I insisted,"OK Ma'm I will come to the staff-room in the break to understand."

And next we have an absconding teacher who when caught gives you a book from a senior class to be read that has no relevance with the topic in hand.

That is the way things work around here.

THE TAG


Came across an interesting 15 Books Tag:

The rules are:
"Don't take too long to think about it. Fifteen books you've read that will always stick with you. First fifteen you can recall in no more than 15 minutes. Tag up to 15 friends, including me because I'm interested in seeing what books my friends choose."

(Order does not indicate preference)

1. Lust for Life by Irving Stone - It is the life-story of Van Gogh. The sheer passion and depth of love that Gogh represents overwhelms me... always.

2.Deception Point by Dan Brown - For the love of the grandeur of Brown's thoughts and story-lines blended with science and technology that swept me off my feet.I love the other books of Dan Brown as well.

3.A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking - Non-fiction scientific book about my favourite particle physics and time and God for the layman.

4.The Tao of Physics by Fritjof Kapra - I might have got the spelling wrong of the author. Some Brown's fans may remember as this being one of the books that was on the shelf of Leonardo Vetra in Angels and Demons. Particle physics again closely intwined with God and this is definitely not for the layman.

5.Surely You're Joking Mr. Feynman by Mr .Richard P. Feynman - A funky look at this physicist's life apart from Quantum Physics.

6.And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie - I read it in 8th class and I still feel its the best in the detective genre.

7.FPS,1 Night @ Call Centre ,3 Mistakes of My Life by Chetan Bhagat - For getting most of India to read. Very-filmy stories but then I love some of the events. Why does every title of his novel need to have a number? (That's three books but come on guys....)

8.Shock by Robin Cook - Crimes in the medical world can never be written better for the engineering mind.

9.The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas - An adventure of a life-time. This huge book does not leave any emotion known to humans untouched.

10.The 5 People You Will Meet In Heaven by Mitch Albom - Exploring the meaning of life and other complexities through death.

11. For One More Day by Mitch Albom - It is the best work by this author and has you questioning yourself in the end.

(And why did I put two of Mitch Albom's books separately.You must read both the books to know that.)

12.Harry Potter Series by J. K. Rowling - The series that taught me the true meaning of the word imagination.

13.The Poison Belt, The Lost World and A Collection of Short Stories by Arthur Conan Doyle - My favourite author from the classics ers.

14. The Mating Season by P.G. Wodehouse - The most hilarious of all his books dealing with all the haps and mishaps that can happen during courting.

15.The Best Laid Plans and The Rage of Angels by Sidney Sheldon - For the sheer pace with which Sheldon narrates such stories.

And I tag whoever is reading this and has not already been tagged and specifically Amrit and Saiyona.

ORIGIN: KOTA

DESTINATION: NEW DELHI
TRAIN: SARVODAYA EXPRESS
TIME: SEVEN HOURS

After the delay of an hour we got on the train. Our seats were occupied by some others as is the norm in such trains. But to see 19 people apart from us three in a compartment was some sort of a shock. People were sitting on the space between the two sleeper berths and on the aisle also.

We requested the 'uncle' to get up and as it turned out his entire family was occupying the seats.

"See, we are respectable people. We don't cause problems to others. And if you want us to get up we will."Having said this the 'uncle' kept sitting. Again we asked him to get up. But he told something to same effect and kept sitting.

Luckily after 5 minutes or so the TTE came along and we atleast got a place to sit-although I was isolated and sharing seats with someone else. Actually the others were waitlisted passengers which did not make it to RAC or confirm list. Still they sat. This is India. Still as was evident all these people had really urgent things to attend to and thats why the TTE I guess was lineant. I am enlisting some unique cases:

1.The 'uncle' and his family were going to arrange I guess their daughter's marriage. But tell me why their entire family was accommodating them?

2.There were two boys around the age of 2o years. They occupied the aisle. They had kept the lights on throughout the night as they were studying for their POLICE FORCE Examination (I am forgetting the exact name.) Hats off to them for even attempting to concentrate.

3. There was this farmer with his goat. He seemed to be accompanying a blind beggar. He was the most annoying person. He did not get down on the platform just before his village but pulled the chain moments later and got down in front of his hut. Lazy people....

It was one of those train journeys I would rather forget. We were up the whole night and bored to the core. Still...

(I have been travelling so there was this delay in my posting.)

My cousin had recently paid me a visit. He lives in a town and his trip to Bhubaneswar (ultimately) served a dual purpose.

Firstly his parents went to a local temple and carried out a puja for him. He had this odd problem. At night he would start shouting out things in odd languages kicking and smacking whoever slept beside him. The priest who was performing the puja blammed this behaviour on the misalignment of planets.(Sometimes I wonder if these planets would not be there who would be there to blame.India!!!)


That night he had slept with me. He starts shouting in his sleep. "Pikachu try electric shock. Shin Shan look out there's mom.Doraemon,Pokemon,Digimon....Tom evade attack. Goku and Picollo save Gohan..." Someone save me. This guy was kicking and smacking me. I woke him up and asked him what he was dreaming about. He drank water and slept again. I did not try to sleep again on the bed - the sofa is much better.

Next day things became clearer. I stayed with my cousin the whole day and all he did was watch television and all he watched on television was cartoons. So that's it...He appeared to be a complete addict actually and got on a high as if he is on drugs.




He was watching Tom and Jerry (Who does not love this?) and as there are no dialogues in the cartoon he was giving commentary describing the scenes and characters and descriptions and their associated dialogues - all given in all the three languages he knew. Hey that's good na!His eloquence and extempore was superb.

But as soon as I told this to my aunt and uncle, they were hell bent that this kid needs to be shown to a psychatrist. And they did go...



THE PRESCRIPTION
All cartoon channels be blocked from this child. He suffers from Cartoon-mania.

Months ago my friend Maurya and me were waiting for the school bus to come back from its first trip and then take us home.


"I really like that girl there,"said Maurya.

I said,"Like? I have never seen you talk with her."

"Just noticed her a few times in school.She is so sweet and nice.Just have a look at her eyes. They are so.... so... "

"So what? Beautiful,deep, mystique,intriguing. So what?"

"No. They are so big and round"

Oh!How prosaic! Sometimes beauty is too good for words. Not that I am saying this girl was beautiful. I had not seen her. I was facing Maurya and he was looking at the girl.

"So, go talk to her man"

"No yaar(friend) what shall I go and tell? Plus she is not even looking at me. No yaar. She will look," said the optimist.

45 minutes later

We are still waiting for the bus and Maurya is still looking at the girl.

"I have had enough,"declared Maurya. "I have been trying to make eye contact with her. But she is not even looking at me. Bhau-Khau"

"How will she know you are looking at her and want to talk with her?"Saying this I turned towards her. "See she is looking the other side. How will she know you were looking?"

"Hey look. She is looking this way now.See,"said Maurya. He improvised with his hairstyle and facial expressions - engineering a very cute boy smile.

"I mean why did she look this way after so much time all of a sudden? Why not before?"said Maurya.

"But tell me what advancement did you make by her looking this way."

"Now I get it. The only difference between all that time and this is that you are facing her. So she turned to look at you. Not me. You traitor. You too Brutus. She is like your bhabhi ."

"Cut out the nautanki(drama). I am not interested in her nor for any relationship. Go talk to her if you want to."

And he went ahead and talked to this girl. She smiled and talked nicely or so it seemed from athe place where I stood. Then Maurya came back.

"So what did she say?"I asked.

"I asked her for her Physics notes and Practical copy. And she will give. But you are in luck."

"I?Luck?"

"She asked your name, traitor"

Thank God the bus came then.

Before I went to on this bus to a town called Balasore I had just alighted from a flight and it starts from there.

GAMES TO PLAY IN AN AIRPORT

This photo speaks for itself(and the sub-heading). It is quite blurred because these kids were moving on this trollley at dangerous speeds and my phone's camera is not all that great. Plus there is a third kid who had to do all the pushing.
I wish I had made a video because then you could have seen how this vehicle was avoiding humans, luggages , pillars, beautiful air-hostesses and other trolleys as well.


SWEAT AND AN ODE TO SNAKE-CHARMERS IN INDIAN FILMS
The bus in which I was making this trip had a driver who was a man of his principles. Actually his only principle that I came to know was that the TV in the bus would only be on if the AC was off. So for half the journey all the passengers had to cope up with a video on the TV that showed songs from Indian movies with snake-charmers as heroes and usually another snake -charmer as the villain. And the snake would always be the heroine. No points for guessing why?


It was a quite aboring show though almost all the villagers travelling in the village were catured by pure cinematic joy. I mean how can people enjoy this. Here's a scene.


Aamir Khan(I did not know he had ever played a snake-charmer) and Juhi Chawla were dancing away. Then night fell and they lit a fire. Aamir was warming himself near the fire. Then Juhi appeared on the scene and bit her lip which was a sort of a symbol for Aamir. He then leaves the fire having found another source of heat and joins Juhi and ....
All this was done to the tune of a been or pungi(an instrument played by snake-charmers). OMG.

AC AND A GIRL
Finally half the trip was finished and the AC was on. And this beautiful girl gets on the bus and guess what?. Occupies the seat next to me. Okay. I had at least two hours. So I could talk with her, impress her, modernise her (if she is a small-town girl), exchange phone numbers.... Actions speak louder than words dude. So just as I was mustering up all my courage to break the ice, she starts crying. I have not spoken as yet girl why are you crying? Is there a problem with my aura itself?

"Why are you crying?" I asked.
"No it is nothing." she said.
"Okay so you cry just like that. "

I don't know why but that made her smile. Girls, when they cry and smile at the same time, look really good.
After a while,
"Can you give me the window seat?See I always vomit everytime I travel by bus...,"she asked, still looking down.

As soon as I heard the word vomit, I had gotten up to exchange the seat.After this exhange I thought the ice was broken and I should talk further but just then...

"Can I use your phone? I have to talk with someone and I don't have balance."
Hey this girl was being too much now. God knows how long she will talk. Nevertheless I gave her the phone. All my fears were allayed when she typed a Vodafone number as Vodafone to Vodafone is free. Yipeee!!

"Please try to understand," she was talking on the phone and I could not stop myself from overhearing. "I was not in town that day. Yeah, I am coming there. No you don't go. We will talk first.We just can't end like this."
Was she talking with her boy-friend?
She said the three magic words just before returning the phone and simultaneosly clearing all my doubts once and for all.
Don't build castles or in this case relationships in air guys.

CATCHING A RUNNING BUS
I went down to a shop to have a cold drink when this bus had stopped for a break. I had not finished when this bus started moving. And I ran(I usually avoid running. I don't look good while running.)I had all my original certificates in my luggage which was now on the bus. Why was not the conductor stopping the bus seeing a stranded passenger running. He made a sign for me to catch the bus running. I ran with all I had and finally near the door I made this jump onto the doorstep. The feeling of going from thhe speed I was running to the speed of the bus in milliseconds is a feeling everyone should feel sometime.The acceleration was intoxicating. People in metros do it everyday though.


SPIDERMAN DID NOT DO THIS
The bus was overloaded by the time we reached Balasore. The conductor was hanging out of the bus literally gripping only to one of the handles on the bus. What a feeling must that be! The girl was sitting two windows away from the door. The conductor made a mini-trip then. He held onto the windows and came to the second window to make the transaction as he had not yet taken money from the girl- all this when the bus is in motion. Plus there was not a bit of fear in his face or eyes that he will ever lose grip and consequently his life. He also returned to the door safely.
And finally I reached Balasore.


LOOK OUT!
My mother and me had been to this temple today. As it was Monday there was this huge rush in the temple and there were about a hundred to two hundred people in the room where the Ling was there. The floor was slippery because of a large number of mashed bananas which were supposed to be for the God. Finally both of us managed to get near the God and my mom stood near the corner while I stood beside.

Just then the priest who was standing still till then turned around ....

"Look out, " I shouted.

But the priest had already smashed the coconut on the wall inches away from my mom's face. OMG. Beware guys.

BURNING SAREES & BOUNDLESS FAITH
The following image showcases seemingly innocuous objects called diyas/deeps but can be fatal at times.






These are called diyas or deeps.








A lady's saree's (for all the non-Indian readers its a clothing Indian women wear) end caught fire and slowly burnt its way up but the devoted lady was busy chanting prayers with eyes closed. Anyone would feel that the saree was on fire but this woman was so much into her prayers that she did not seem to notice at first. Finally she did notice when the priest threw a bucket of water at her. The woman obviously was too taken aback by the fire burning out that she fainted.

Amazingly till she was praying she seemed fine. As they say, ignorance is bliss.

FORGIVE & FORGET
People give their offerings to God on this huge round bronze plate. It is usually filled with lots and lots of coins and a few random notes usually those that are torn or crumpled if you notice closely. I was just looking around while my mother finished her prayers and my eyes fell on this lady. Her fingers (and consequently she) were upto no good. She was faking as if she was putting a coin on the plate but actually she was taking away coins. She did this for about two to three times. Quite a thief !

But then all of a sudden she took out those collected coins and kept them back on the plate and looked around for people noticing her great offering because people usually give one or two rupees. God for this lady will forgive and forget.



CCD 2PM

"I am having a break-up," said Shruti.

This news and the cold-drink that I was drinking almost choked me.

"See Debi things are not fine between him and me. I might as well have faked that things are okay since the last few weeks but the truth is I am not okay with him any longer," said Shruti.

"So when are you actually breaking-up?" I asked.

"Today. I will just tell him straight off it's over. If he has got an active brain with a moderate emotional quotient he should have realised it that this was on the cards. I can't go on any longer like this."

This obviously did not open any lines as I was too much of a friend to change lanes but it did give me a feel of curiosity. I really wanted to know how a relationship goes out into oblivion - the dynamics and causes involved. So just out of curiosity I put forth the following proposition.

"So Shruti, why don't you ask him a few things after you break up. I guess he won't fake anything and tell you what is on his mind. You know now that he does not need to fake any emotions if any...."

"I hate authors Debi"

Hey, that was a shock. Such a mundane generalisation.

"Authors never leave a chance to study situations. So now you have a perfect situation in front of you. What more do you need for a spicy post with a little exaggeration and...."

"Shruti, I did not .."

"Just want a situation. You guys never care for emotions. I loved that guy and you don't console or advice or for God's sake do anything that you deign to do but you ask me to ask some questions."

"The only reason I asked you to ask was because you were breaking up and not faking any longer. I did not expect you to break down when you break up. "

That last line stopped the impending tears. We shifted to a lighter topic.

SMS received at 2 AM
i was thinkin nd guess i will ask him the questions. lets c wat he actlly thks. i still hate authors.

I replied
i m just a blogger no author. good night.

HISTORY

In the 21st century a couple of bored Bansalites started out with this game. The task was simple to convert cricket from being a 75 yard field game to it being played in an average-sized room. They started playing with this clip-board for a bat, a rolled paper-ball for a ball and a bucket for a wicket. Obviously that paper ball did not bounce at all, so all balls had to be full-tosses. Very repetitive indeed.So they had to leave this mundane arrangement. These guys simply put cellotape on the paper ball which at least made it possible for it to bounce. After that there was no stopping them. Hours were spent sweating it out in the room. And fans had to be switched off as you know any aerial stroke then ended up being a threat for the lamp, tube-light, clock and etc etc which were saved many times from damage because of uber-quick reflexes of some players. The popularity of the game spread and the entire PG ended up playing it(even the nerds ended up here around 2 am sometimes.)Sometimes they had visiting players from neighbouring PGs as well.








THE PAPER BALL(As preserved in the Museum for Room Cricket , Rudra's Room ,Trivedi Gardens made by the founders themselves.)









EQUIPMENT
1.BAT- Clipboard or a bat-like structure used to clean clothes or sometimes a real bat
2.BALL-Cellotaped paperballs, Smiley Stress Balls(great bounce and sometimes they spun as well.)
3.WICKET-Bucket or sometimes two buckets to give bowlers a good chance.
4.TOWELS- These were the most important because it got really sweaty.
5.BOUNDARY ROPE-The wall at the opposite end.







THE SMILEY STRESS BALL(Introduced by Apu. Available at any stationers for a price varying from Rs 10 - Rs 20)










SKILLS & RULES
Same as the usual cricket.

AWARDS
1.Most Unforgettable Moment Award - Debi(Myself) and Gunjan Misra. I smacked the ball with which Gunjan had promised by his life to get me bowled straight into the tube light and it rained glass and white powder leaving us in sheer darkness.

2.Best Commentator Award- Satvik. He has the best commentating skills and includes vernacular proverbs that make it so funny and enjoyable.(Once a match was abandoned as no one could stop laughing.)

3.Best Camerawork- These matches and the commentary on them were recorded on Apu's phone mostly by Rudra.

4. Best Spinner Award - Robin. He really spins it a lot with that stress ball.

5.Most Damages Award - Debi . I somehow ended up breaking the walls of the PG a lot of times. (Sorry Uncleji for all that noise and bits of walls missing in Rudra's room.)

This post is now available to be put in any physical education book for 12th class.

It was swelteringly hot and five more people stood in front of us in the line at the Vigyan Nagar Post Office. The line was static. Why? The man at the counter said whatever may be the case they won't take letters or parcel during his lunch hours even if he just sat and chat with his colleagues.

Just then three ladies entered the scene.

"Oh My God! What a long line ! ," said Lady A.
"Don't Worry," said Lady B. "There must be a separate line for women. Since there is none now , we will make one."

Saying this she had started a line for women. There was a protest from a person ( obviously bearing a different set of chromosomes) but that was snubbed down easily by the threesome.Other ladies also followed suit as in a game of hearts. My friend Rudra and me were left flabbergasted.

"It is such a waste of time for students when they have to come by themselves to post their forms. I wish the Institute would do something for these students. It would save a lot of time and..." Lady C did not seem to think it proper to keep her conversation private or short.

Suddenly an idea clicked. I went up to Lady B ( the most vulnerable looking) and said ,"Aunty , Can you post the form for me when you are posting yours. A lot of time would be saved. Please Aunty," in my most flattering voice.

"Son, it would be injustice on others standing here if I did this for you. It would be wrong and you are..."

I cut her short. "Thanks a lot, Aunty, anyways" with a lot of stress on the word Aunty.Hypocrites. She had a chance to save my time but no... justice, truth and what not to cover up.

Five minutes later when the counter opened there was some confusion there. Lady B came out of line, in her hand she held half a twenty-rupee note. I say half cause it had so dexterously torn into two halves(one of which she held) that it seemed that it was a note that was folded in half.




See you can't tell whether its folded in half or cut into two halves till you feel which our lady here was too preoccupied to
notice.







"That potato-vendor. I will kill him today. Look at the rascal...., " said Lady B although she was using language that forbade the use of the title.

Serves her right for being so obsessed with justice.

"Thank God, it was not a hundred rupee note," said Lady A as the trio left the post-office.

Now just look at the economics involved. The potato vendor if he got away with the other half he gets away with a total of twenty plus twenty forty rupees. So a profit of twenty rupees if that note was his and a profit of forty rupees if he had found it and also the idea of not discarding it.

Indian trains are so filled with characters to be studied, situations to be observed and time to be killed when the train fails to make it on time. Here is what I went through on a recent one.

1.The Games Daddy Plays on a Departing Train
Morning 6 AM. I decided to sleep as soon as I got myself a seat. But a wailing kid was not letting me snooze. The train had just begun to move and surprisingly as fast as the train was picking up speed, this kid's lamentations were increasing in volume. Almost every person was now glued to this child.

"Papa. Papa." This is what the boy's sobs were punctuated with. Where is this guy 's father?

His mom was nonchalantly smiling at everyone else. Why don't you console your child?

"How will Papa come now mama? The train is moving so fast," staring at the end of the aisle.

"Papa can come son. He will.You see."

"No he won't." And he starts crying at the top of his voice.

From the opposite end, a man who was standing there till then comes in smiling as if he loved the wail. Slowly and suavely he marched down the aisle. He went up to this kid and lifted him- simultaneously silencing the boy. The dad I guess.

"How did you come on this train? It is moving so fast."

"Daddy can do anything, son."

At least that silenced the kid.

2.Don't buy a Newspaper
Never ever buy a newspaper on a train. The entire compartment thinks the newspaper to be theirs. And if you are in a Janshatabdi where an entire compartment is the bogie itself you are in for infringements in your reading of the daily news. But those who do so do it in style and with elan.

Style 1
The man next to you is the most dangerous. He starts reading the news loudly with his comments and views. Then he starts taking away the news page by page without your permission. Then forcefully asks about your thoughts and when you say you have none, he looks at you with an air of disgrace proud of his views.

Style 2
The man in the seat behind you. He is on the alert for the moment you keep the newspaper down. He attacks you straight away and takes it without even deigning to ask.

Style 3
The man in the who you notice does not want to sit even though empty seats abound around him is also quite a piece. He approaches you slowly as if approaching his date and asks "Do you have the newspaper?" and if you answer in the negative "But you were reading it a moent ago."
Such people really have awesome observation skills.

3.A Himesh Reshammiya Fan
Friends, this species is not yet extinct.

Fan: Don't you enjoy HR. HR- He's a Rockstar..
I: No, I don't. He is very repetitive and ..
Fan:Repetitive? HR is not repetitive. That is the last thing anyone would say about HR. Did not you hear the latest hit Tandoori Nights.

He plays the song mentioned on his Made in China phone.

Fan(in unison with the ROCKSTAR) : Tan Tana Tan Tana Tan Tandoori Nights. See the freshness in the tone and lyrics. Tan Tana Tan ...
I: Yeah, right. As fresh as a tandoori out of the grill, na?
Fan: How rightly said. HR is all about passion....

And finally ended his sermon with "JAI MATA DI."

4.Translating Hindi Songs
The train was filled with lots of people who had these chic China cells. And almost all of them had put their favourite number on the playlist playing loudly. Most of these were either old hindi or new oriya songs. I decided to translate one. Saat samundar paar.....
Here is what I came up with at the end.

Seven seas across,
I came over to fuss,
Following you everywhere,
You are such a villain,
That all my beauty goes in vain.

Does not make much sense yet importantly it rhymed.

5. What is IIT?
When you are travelling with a lot of people from rural parts. you do have odd conversations. This guy asked me , "What are you doing- as in working or studying?"
"I have given my exam for IIT and am..."
"What is IIT?"

I was taken aback for a second. Speechless.How are you supposed to give the full feel about something which you are over-obsessed with?

I mumbled, " It is a really good college - the best in India- in which you take admission after 12th."

I think that much should be enough. Beyond that there would be complications.

6.A Train Change
On our return trip .....

Our train had stopped at this really insignificant station and a really scruffy voice shouts,"All passenegers on train number ----( I don't remember) Baripada Express are hereby informed to get onto train number ---- (not this also) Sambalpur Express as the former train won't go further due to an engine failure. Please bear with us."

And within a span of five eventful minutes an entire train had emptied itself of its passengers who had occupied another train that could not be described to anything as close as empty. This Express had changed into a local train with more people standing than sitting. Our mini-trip ended on this train after another 15 minutes.

7. The Feel Of Speed
Whenever you are on an Indian train sometime or the other you are bound to get this feeling of moving at a really high velocity. Although we would be hardly touching an 80. With the wind gushing in and individual bogies not vibrating in phase with each other you really get this feel.
I don't know whether I am exactly able to convey what I want to but I think you must be getting a rough idea of sorts.

I think these many would be enough for now as such this post is too long.


I really have no idea where this relationship with Shruti is going to. All I know it's not love. But love is what we were talking of the other day.

"Love, they say, is the sweetest fever. Love - the most powerful and effective force that ever drove any human in any particular direction. Love, they say, can ignite what time has extinguished. If there ever was a person who ran away from love, he ran away from life.It's a dreamweaver that enables us to dream with open eyes. Love, they say, is nothing short of a miracle if you have found one that's true. If it has to happen, it will... there is no particular way. Love, they say, ...," said Shruti(obviously).

What is wrong with this girl? Love, they say... Love, they say...No one says all this, girl. Only you say such things.Girl, you are in love with love.


I did not stop her from explaining the dynamics of love. At least that gave me an opportunity to look and admire her dusky beauty and catch expressions that Katherine Heigl only can produce on the demand of a director.

"Debi....Are you listening or not? Am I talking with a pillar? Debi.."

"Love , I think, is a compromise. "It is always not rainbows and butterflies sometimes it's just a compromise." That's what Maroon5 had to say about love. Love, I think, always leaves you contemplating. Thinking whether you are in it or just faking it for the sake. Love, I think, is a deception, an illusion that ..."

"You are such a cynic", she cut me short.

"So have you ever loved someone then?" I asked.

"No. I have not. That is why I just kept on telling. Love, they say, not Love I think."

So here I had my chance to tell something nice and romantic- let's clear my image of a cynic. What shall I say? Think, Debi think.

"Don't worry Shruti. Love, they say," I paused for dramatic effect, "takes a moment."

Good job, Debi. That was neat.

"Yeah, you are right Debi but sometimes this one moment takes a lot of time to come."

How true her words were. Perhaps the only thing that was true from what all she had said before. Now she was knowing what's love. Or at least I hoped so.

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